Sunday, June 4, 2017

MAY 2017 EDITION

What was the biggest thing that happened in the month of May for me? That is easy to answer: Peggy and I celebrated our 50th anniversary on May 20!  We are proud of the fact that our marriage has endured the test of time. Would you allow me to be a bit personal in this newsletter? I would like to share some of the highlights of our fifty years together.

We were just kids when we married! We were both twenty-one. I was in college and working in the restaurant business in various capacities. We did not know what we did not know about marriage! We started a family while I was finishing school.

 After graduation, I became a sales representative for two different wholesale liquor and wine distributors, calling on bars and restaurants. Our second child was born during those years. My job entailed some late nights “smoozing” bartenders and managers. The next job I had was general manager of a very popular restaurant with the singles crowd. This restaurant attracted numerous Atlanta professional sports figures. As manager, there were many 60 to 70 hour workweeks. In addition, after closing at two a.m., it was popular for the staff to go to an after hours nightspot to unwind. As you might guess, I was not a great family man. I was self-centered. I sought to satisfy my time away from the restaurant with things I enjoyed. I felt entitled because I worked so hard. All the while, Peggy was busy raising our two beautiful daughters and working part-time. Truthfully, it was not much of a marriage. During that time, we never considered divorce. I suspect, however, that Peggy might have considered murder! I finally consented to go to a marriage counselor. We began the process of learning to communicate with each other.

In about year ten of our marriage, Peggy began attending a Bible Study. There she began a personal relationship with Jesus at that time. I thought that was a nice thing for her, like a garden club or other women’s activities. She talked to me about her newfound faith but I said I was not interested. Little did I know that she had the women of that Bible Study praying for me.

 Here, the plot thickens! Peggy conspired with her friend in our apartment complex to put on a covered dish supper for couples. The friend’s husband was on staff with Campus Crusade and he would be speaking after dinner. I grudgingly consented to attend, looking forward to a good meal. That night, April 29th, 1975, I surrendered my life to Christ and the direction of our marriage took an upward trajectory that continues to this day. I admit that it has not been a smooth, steady upward climb. There have been many setbacks along the way but the constant presence of God’s Spirit has enabled us to face the difficult times together; which has helped strengthen our relationship along the way. We do not claim to have the perfect marriage. I know I still can be self-centered and an “ornery old cuss” at times. We still have times of “intense fellowship” i.e. quarrels but now we find that we cannot go too long without seeking each other’s forgiveness.

What have I learned in these 50 years of marriage? Here are a few things, guys, that might be helpful. 

It’s not about me. It’s about we.

 “If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose. Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves.  Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.”    Philippians 2:1-4 (NIV)

Be extravagant with your wives.

This does not necessarily mean money. More importantly, I believe it means being extravagant in thoughtfulness. Little things mean a lot. Years ago, when I would travel, I began leaving “post it” love notes all over the house for her to find. Also, occasionally, I would go to Kroger and buy a small bouquet of flowers and stick them under the windshield wipers close to the time she would get off work.

“I came not to be served but to serve.” Matthew 20:28

Some years ago, I attended a Promise Keepers event in Atlanta. A speaker named Wellington Boone issued this challenge for the men gathered there. “Men, seek to outserve your wife.” Wow. What a challenge! One of the great questions I have learned to ask is: “Honey, how can I help?” Look for ways you can do things for her without her asking. When she needs something to be done, write it down, make a list. We guys love to check “to do” lists off . “Git ‘er done” without her asking twice!

“Is this a hill to die on?

When you are in “intense fellowship” with your spouse, ask yourself that question. Is it so necessary for you to win the day, to be right, or to preserve  peace and harmony?
Love your wives sacrificially.
“Husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.”
Ephesians 5:25

These are a few things that I have learned. I do not always practice them but I try.


What is our secret of our fifty years of marriage? Our dependence on the love of God the Father, the sinless life, the death and Resurrection of Jesus Christ and the guidance of the Holy Spirit. We can also say that we had the willingness to persevere and not give up on each other, doing the hard work of keeping our marriage strong, and being each other’s greatest cheerleaders. Praise God from whom all blessings flow!
Posted by at

No comments:

Post a Comment

Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)

Net Work Ministries, Inc. Purpose Statement

The purpose of Net Work Ministries is to bring hope and healing to men and their families by exposing them to the love of Jesus Christ in word and deed. Net Work also encourages men in living out their Christian faith in their day-to-day lives.

Net Work Ministries, Inc. is a pastoral counseling and resource networking ministry that brings God's people together for mutual support and enables them to use the abundant resources He provides. It is directed towards men, to bring them into a personal relationship with Jesus Christ and to help them use the power of this relationship to become the men God intended them to be. This ministry helps men deal with issues that affect their everyday lives. It is a faith ministry that depends entirely on the Lord for resources and does not charge for its services. It is a fully accredited 501c3 I.R.S. organization.

Net Work Ministries was begun 1991 by a group of men who knew Buck Reese's giftedness in the areas of pastoral counseling and resource networking. Buck, who is a native of Atlanta, has been in ministry since 1975 and is an ordained minister. He was responsible for starting the Young Life high school ministry in Cobb County in 1977 and served as Area Director for 12 years. Buck was the Director of Church Relations for Rapha, Inc., a Christian counseling program, as well as serving as a pastoral counseling intern at Wesley Woods Geriatric Center. For 20 years Buck served as chaplain and assistant coach of the Marietta High School football team. Buck was selected to be a member of the 1998 class of Leadership Cobb and the 1999 class of the Honorary Commanders, programs of the Cobb County Chamber of Commerce.

Buck's full-time commitment is to Net Work Ministries. He is in contact with men of all ages and walks of life. A typical routine would include: Having breakfast or lunch with a businessman to offer counsel and encouragement to strengthen their commitment to Christ and to enjoy each other's fellowship and support. In all these situations, Buck offers a listening ear and a caring heart and shares Scripture and wisdom given by the Holy Spirit. The goal in all of this activity is to bring those who do not know Christ into a saving relationship with Him. To those who are committed to Christ, but are dealing with issues of day-to-day living, he gives loving and effective counsel, encouragement and support.

Recently, I have added a new role to my ministry. I have accepted the role as volunteer Chaplain to the Staff of Young Life Southeast Region, which consists of the states of Georgia and Alabama. There are currently 50 local area ministries with staff. I will be the"minister to the ministers."

The Concept of Net Work Ministries

From Henri Nouwen’s book “Gracias”:

“It is a privilege to have the time to practice this simple ministry of presence. Still, it is not as simple as it seems. My own desire to be useful, to do something significant, or to be part of some impressive project is so strong that soon my time is taken up by meetings, conferences, study groups, and workshops that prevent me from walking the streets. It is difficult not to have plans, not to organize people around an urgent cause, and not to feel that you are working directly for social progress. But I wonder more and more if the first thing shouldn’t be to know people by name, to eat and drink with them, to listen to their stories and tell your own, and to let them know with words, handshakes, and hugs that you do not simply like them, but truly love them.

From "The Hole In Our Gospel" by Richard Stearns, President of World Vision:

It is rare that a simple recitation of the gospel will cause people to instantly change their minds. It usually takes much more than that. Our own narrative typically involves a journey of discovery marked by relationships with respected friends and loved ones, reading, discussions, learning about the basis for Christian faith, seeing the difference faith made in the lives of people we know, and witnessing genuine faith demonstrated through acts of love and kindness towards others.

I Stand At The Door - My Calling To Men's Ministry

I Stand at the Door

By Sam Shoemaker (from the Oxford Group)


I stand by the door.
I neither go to far in, nor stay to far out.
The door is the most important door in the world -
It is the door through which men walk when they find God.
There is no use my going way inside and staying there,
When so many are still outside and they, as much as I,
Crave to know where the door is.
And all that so many ever find
Is only the wall where the door ought to be.
They creep along the wall like blind men,
With outstretched, groping hands,
Feeling for a door, knowing there must be a door,
Yet they never find it.
So I stand by the door.

The most tremendous thing in the world
Is for men to find that door - the door to God.
The most important thing that any man can do
Is to take hold of one of those blind, groping hands
And put it on the latch - the latch that only clicks
And opens to the man's own touch.

Men die outside the door, as starving beggars die
On cold nights in cruel cities in the dead of winter.
Die for want of what is within their grasp.
They live on the other side of it - live because they have not found it.

Nothing else matters compared to helping them find it,
And open it, and walk in, and find Him.
So I stand by the door.

Go in great saints; go all the way in -
Go way down into the cavernous cellars,
And way up into the spacious attics.
It is a vast, roomy house, this house where God is.
Go into the deepest of hidden casements,
Of withdrawal, of silence, of sainthood.
Some must inhabit those inner rooms
And know the depths and heights of God,
And call outside to the rest of us how wonderful it is.
Sometimes I take a deeper look in.
Sometimes venture in a little farther,
But my place seems closer to the opening.
So I stand by the door.

There is another reason why I stand there.
Some people get part way in and become afraid
Lest God and the zeal of His house devour them;
For God is so very great and asks all of us.
And these people feel a cosmic claustrophobia
And want to get out. 'Let me out!' they cry.
And the people way inside only terrify them more.
Somebody must be by the door to tell them that they are spoiled.
For the old life, they have seen too much:
One taste of God and nothing but God will do any more.
Somebody must be watching for the frightened
Who seek to sneak out just where they came in,
To tell them how much better it is inside.
The people too far in do not see how near these are
To leaving - preoccupied with the wonder of it all.
Somebody must watch for those who have entered the door
But would like to run away. So for them too,
I stand by the door.

I admire the people who go way in.
But I wish they would not forget how it was
Before they got in. Then they would be able to help
The people who have not yet even found the door.
Or the people who want to run away again from God.
You can go in too deeply and stay in too long
And forget the people outside the door.
As for me, I shall take my old accustomed place,
Near enough to God to hear Him and know He is there,
But not so far from men as not to hear them,
And remember they are there too.

Where? Outside the door -
Thousands of them. Millions of them.
But - more important for me -
One of them, two of them, ten of them.
Whose hands I am intended to put on the latch.
So I shall stand by the door and wait
For those who seek it.

'I had rather be a door-keeper
So I stand by the door.


About Me

My photo
Marietta, Georgia, United States
Buck is a native of Atlanta. He graduated from Georgia State University with a business degree. He spent 10 years in the restaurant business prior to going into the ministry in 1976. He is an ordained minister. Buck has been married to Peggy for 52 years. He has two married daughters and seven grandchildren ranging in age from six to twenty-five years old . Peggy and Buck have lived in West Cobb for forty years.

Blog Archive

Net Work Ministries Testimonials

Quotes

“I have been involved in Net Work Ministries for almost six years. I am privileged to serve on the Board of Directors and work with Buck on a variety of projects i.e.: Young Life, Good Samaritan Health Clinic, P.A.C.E., working with the poor and indigent, and supporting the men who attend Buck’s groups.

Buck and Peggy have been there for my wife Rita and I through our most difficult times. They are always loving, always supportive. Buck and his ministry are a wonderful example of what it means to serve. It’s what the love of Christ encourages all of us to do for each other.”

Dwayne Lambing,
Regional Vice President
Nordco, Inc.



The Friday group began as an opportunity for me to have in depth conversation about subject matter that I was not totally comfortable with i.e. formal religion and my personal relationship with God. I believed intellectually that the universe was not an accidental explosion, but it demonstrated a purpose that only a Creator could know. I felt a part of that universe and was comfortable with my life and the roles I played in it. But I still asked myself, is that all there is to life.

Through a series of very diverse and interesting books it became increasingly apparent that no growth in self is possible without the "pains" of self examination. Sometimes this would occur during the course of "intense" discussions and other times would occur in moments of quiet reflection on these conversations. I began to notice that in this crucible of frank and honest discourse that I could find a voice for my beliefs and at the same time be intellectually true to my beliefs in science.

As it has turned out for me, the books have been less important than the comfort and strength that I find in the relationship of men willing to discuss matters that are not in their comfort zones , and that require an intellectual and emotional honesty that are not found alone on an island.
Thank you for your role in making all of this possible,



Dr. Peter Re’,

Neurologist