Every year at this time, I pause to remember the night thirty-five years ago that I began a new life, a life in a relationship with Jesus Christ. For me, it was such a radical departure from the norm of my life up to that point that it still amazes me even after all these years.
Why God chose me to be His child and adopted me into His family still staggers my imagination! Why me, Lord? It was and remains “amazing grace”.
When I began the new journey, I brought along with me a great deal of baggage. It took me fifteen years to begin to drop the heavy load I was carrying. You see, I came loaded down with performance and self-esteem issues. Add to this, the desperate need for approval and you have a toxic mix of emotional baggage. Later on, when I sat with a spiritual director, I was told that when I came into a relationship with the God of the Universe, I had just ”infinitized” the problem. Instead of trying to gain the approval of my earthly father and others, I was constantly trying to perform correctly for my Heavenly Father to gain His acceptance and approval as well as others.
Additionally, I brought a good deal of bottled-up anger into this new relationship. My spiritual director said this anger was like a box of springs that just kept popping out.
Our family suppressed so much anger by the way we dealt with our dysfunction. It left so many emotions unexpressed that they had to eventually come out. All that my anger needed to set it off was some sort of “trigger”, like unmet expectations or confrontation. Through a long and difficult process, I began to recognize and deal with these issues. Probably, one of the most important things that helped me was a book written by Brennan Manning called “The Ragamuffin Gospel”. In it, I discovered the gift of grace. I learned of God’s love for me “in the morning sun and the evening rain” of my life (Brennan Manning). I am learning, also, to give grace to others. Learning to love your neighbor as yourself as we are commanded involves not only learning to love your neighbor, who is sometimes very difficult; but it also involves loving yourself. Sometimes the most unlovable person is the person you see everyday in the mirror. When you can really come to love yourself as God loves you, you are set free to love others.
In my thirty-five year journey of faith in Christ, I experienced God’s faithfulness through the tough times and the good times. In discussing my journey in this “epistle”, please understand that I have a long way to go in my growth as a disciple of Christ. I wish, in no way, to imply that I have arrived at Christian maturity. Those around me can surely attest to this fact! But I do know that Christ has walked with me (and even carried me) along the way. I would not trade the years I have spent with Christ for all the riches this world has to offer.
In these thirty-five years, I have lived a grand adventure with Peggy, my bride, at my side every step of the way. What a journey it has been! What lies ahead only God knows? However, as it is said, “I do not know what the future holds, but I do know the One who holds the future”. I can and will rest in the knowledge that He is in control. I just need to stay close, listen, trust, and obey Him.
Are you experiencing each day of your life as a new adventure in His amazing grace? Have you begun a life lived in relation with Jesus Christ, the greatest adventure of all? If not, let’s talk. If you have but have not experienced life in this manner, let’s talk.
MINISTRY NEWS
Officiated funeral of family member (cousin)
Facilitated two weekly men’s groups
Met individually with men for counseling and encouragement on a daily basis.
Arranged for professional addiction counseling for
person.
Hospital visitation.
MINISTRY NEEDS:
Ministry Car needs new set of tires. Due to economic conditions, money is not there in budget for these. Best deal I can find is $480 for decent tires that will last.
I am available to facilitate another men’s group in the mornings during the week. I also am available to facilitate your men’s group retreat. Contact me at 678-986-4814.
I am so grateful to each one of you for your love and support!
Christ - The ReeseSource - The Newsletter of Net Work Ministries, Inc.